So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize