and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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