I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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