Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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