thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize