you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
fuck your aforementioned shoe
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Randomize