I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize