I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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