hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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