no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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