can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
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Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
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Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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