Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
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