I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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