the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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