he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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