my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize