dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
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did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
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I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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