yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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