so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize