one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
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should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
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