Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
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