I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
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