you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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