Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize