Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
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