it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize