It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
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Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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