I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
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how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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