He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize