What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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