I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
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