her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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