escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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