Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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