Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
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swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
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no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize