I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Randomize