Whod you bang
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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