We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
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Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
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I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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