Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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