there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
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