i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
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