Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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