In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
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