you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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