i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Randomize