just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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