gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize