You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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