dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
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