well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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